新選組!

was watching a few episodes of the 43rd NHK taiga drama ‘shinsengumi!’ the 切っ掛け came when i found out that shingo katori played kondou isao in that drama, together with fujiwara tatsuya as okita souji.

there was this scene about haw yamanami went back to commit seppuku for desertion instead of running away with the woman that he loved. kondou and okita were talking about how he died admirably.

i cant really see what’s so admirable about slitting your own stomach and then having your comrade cut off your head for you.

新選組!

Shingo Mama

shingo mama gained a new fan.

次は？

honestly, what’s next? i’ve already given my holidays till june away to a dango store, doing semi-brainless work. i’m just glad they’re paying me. i haven’t starting learning driving, guitar, or the language french. i haven’t seriously thought about the future, besides being very sure that i won’t go into IT or finance. i haven’t been able to go for training, so my goalkeeping is currently full of shit, as usual.

there’s no progress. i’m going crazy. i need to move. i need up.

仕方ないだろうこりゃ

read career guide 2010. i fail both the height and weight requirements for some jobs i’m interested in.

seriously, those bastards. they’re discriminating against short people.
realized that i should probably have spent more time thinking about my future career and actually try for some internship which might help my application next time, instead of rushing headfirst into a part time job. though it’s probably too late for things like that. also realized i should have invested some time in martial arts. again it’s too late for regrets. i’m already dreading march, when all available universities will drop me like a hot potato when they see my dastardly A level grades.

anyhow, we’ll see. the language used in the annual career guides is so hyperbolic that it makes me laugh sometimes.

溜め息

i really want to play floorball. i just only want to play. why on earth is it so difficult?

痣だらけ

this is amazing. i’m now covered with contusion marks, but i’ve got this particularly huge ball shaped bruise on my left chest and it actually hurts when i raise my left arm.
my brother with his hard blade sure didn’t go easy on me (did he?). 上等だ。i’d rather he didnt anyway. though it means that i cant wear tank tops for the next few days.

筋肉痛です

okay, the effort spent yesterday on goalkeeping has taken its toll. muscle aches in quads, glutes, back, shoulders and biceps. could hardly stand straight during work today. i’ve grown old.

i’m going to throw confetti on the day my boss stop the samples. when it comes to free samples, one large part of singaporeans suddenly turn into PIGS . it’s as if they suddenly forget about manners when they see free food. we could just turn into a soup kitchen next time. hello? they don’t come to the counter asking if those were samples, they first ask if the food’s free. then they call out to their friends, saying ‘aye! try for free! no need to give money one.’ and they clean out the plate. then they make up an excuse as to why they cant buy, so that they can save face. i don’t eat sugar. i’m too full. it’s nice but it’s expensive. we’ll come back (they usually don’t). truth is most of them dont bother, they usually just walk off, some of them taking a few more helpings with them.

ohhh my goodness. i don’t know where to hide my face. i can almost imagine what impression we’re making on the japanese, who would probably think we’re barbarians. (actually they already do.)

there were many such customers today, and i think the strain of smiling sweetly at such people almost brought tears to my eyes. i face them all the time, so i have no idea why i got so particularly angry with them today. i think it’s the pain in my glutes.

フローボール

やっと、やっと。

went for junior’s training with kahyee at tampines today. it’s been.. 5 months since i put on my helmet and goalkeeped? i think i almost forgot how it was like to lug gear to training and lug smelly gear back from training, and also how the pain from contact with shots feel like. i actually miss the pain. i think i’m masochistic.

the heatstroke, the bruises, the ripped skin, the skinned elbows, the sore knees. it’s so nostalgic that i can cry. and i think i haven’t had so much fun in months.

got new kneepads. they’re hell expensive, but somehow things like that are worth every cent.

if only i could play everyday after work.

roger tönz, goalkeeper of the swiss national team

遺伝子 *_*

read this article about epigenetics in the latest issue of TIME magazine today.

about how lifestyle choices could change the strength of expression of certain DNA by switching on or off the epigenetic ‘marks’ above the genes, thereby affecting offspring in just one generation.

this is a super strong impetus for me to never touch cigarettes, and to cut down on pigging out on food or indulging in alcohol, because it might affect my children’s lifespan or intelligence. cannot cannot cannot. i need my future three children to be geniuses. they must never need to lose sleep and hair over chemistry due to sheer stupidity and 鈍感-ness, like i did.

and i really like what the article said, about how the nature versus nurture argument was already made redundant by epigenetics.
i think people will call me crazy, but i do wish i was still doing general paper. i would have loved to write an essay on this issue.

それでもいい

it’s okay if you were lying, or if your words were empty. i won’t be swayed, no matter how much i may toy with the idea, but thank you all the same.
理性が振っ飛ぶほど嬉しかったぜ。なんかバカみたいだけど。

痒い！

the solitude, the silence, just before a penalty

i need to goalkeep again, before i lose it all. i still haven’t forgotten what i wanted to achieve as a keeper.. like i promised myself a few months ago. ‘bought’ my gear second hand with my salary and i cant wait to get into it and get hit by flying floorballs again. just that IVP is next week and no team in the right mind would now accept a keeper who can make it for trainings only on saturday morning. (if only i didnt have my part time job, but i cannot not do my part time job. it’s a difficult situation.)

this is besides the point, but i’m blowing out in all proportions and putting on an extra layer of blubber above my hips due to relative inactivity. my lack of exercise kind of disgusts me. rain had stopped me from running after getting off work for almost a week. a week. this is horrible. and i feel extremely fat already. if this goes on i’ll be cutting all carbohydrates from my diet soon.

競争神が！

i need up.

i need to overcome.

oh my goodness. i think people will laugh if they ever knew that these seemingly unimportant issues have been screwing around with my head for the last few days.

and don’t you think it’s funny that my studying materials include BLnovels like aida saki sensei’s decoy series and BLdrama scripts?