i still feel like i’m looking into a nightmare everytime i look in the mirror. am entirely covered and there’s no place without rash. there’s even one in my ear canal and places i don’t exactly want to identify. and my face still looks like volcanic landscape.
didn’t quite realise i might be this vain haha. good to know now.
and the itch is preventing me from falling asleep. lack of sleep, unbearable itch and fever sometimes brings about bouts of insanity at night and i imagine unpleasant things and have nightmares like sitting on the bench for the entire season (don’t laugh you).
and best of all my mom gets it for the second time. all my fault i know. it isn’t at all fair, all the suffering should have been mine alone. i guess being a mom sucks as well, sometimes
and brother, you’re the best. thank you.
遠くの空が白むまで走り抜けても
消えない
それは消えないよ
風に景色が溶けるまで踏み続けても
消えない
それは消えないよ
–> Night Diving by Asian Kung-Fu Generation-
茉莉花の独り言 